Attitude of Gratitude

Have you ever really sat down and counted your blessings?  I wonder how our days would be if we all started them out by counting our blessings instead of counting our 'To-Do Lists'.  I want to share a few stories with you about gratitude (and sadly, one of them is a story about a lack there of).

The first story is something I witnessed over the weekend.  I work at a luxurious boutique hotel, and part of my job is checking people into their rooms.  I was working with my manager who was about to check in a couple.  The young man said he had a reservation, but my manager did not see his name on the list of arrivals.  The man was very nice and very patient.  He looked at his iPhone to look at his confirmation letter.  He said, "Oh No.... I made the reservation for tomorrow night.  This is my fault.  Do you have any rooms for tonight?"  My manager felt bad because we were completely sold out.  Before my manager could tell him that we would be glad to find them a room along the coast for the evening, this man's wife did something that really made me sad.  In front of us, she said something to her husband.  She said it in a way that was part serious, part sarcastic, part making her husband feel bad.  She said, "This is why I do all the planning for our trips."  After she said this, my manager found him a reservation at another really nice hotel, and we told him that we hope to see him in the future.  He was so grateful for my managers kindness.  What made me so irritated was his wife and her attitude.  For the sake of argument, I am going to try and put myself in her shoes.  Here goes..............

............ I show up to a very nice looking hotel.  My husband and I are very excited and have been looking forward to this for quite some time.  The weather is great, and I'm happy to be there.  I find out that my husband made a mistake and accidentally booked the room for tomorrow night instead of tonight, and the really beautiful hotel did not have a room for us. I can see that my husband feels bad (and probably a little embarrassed)......  Okay, now pause here for a moment................... I really, truly feel that if this were me, I would have laughed and made the best of the situation.  I would not have been upset with him or made him feel bad (or try to embarrass him in front of strangers to make it known who exactly made the error).  I know that before the trip, on the way, and when we showed up, and even after finding out the mishap, I would have thought, "Wow, my husband is so cool because he looked at THIS place online, and wanted to bring me here.  That is very sweet and thoughtful, and I am grateful." 

I am not trying to say this to make me sound better than this woman, but I came home, told my husband, and I expressed how sad this woman made me for her husband.  She truly irritated me.  After the irritation was over, I thought about how grateful she should have been.  I told myself, "If I am ever in this type of situation, I hope that I will be positive, look on the bright side, and make my husband feel better and not bad or embarrassed."

My other story is something that I found on youtube (seriously, I love youtube!  What ever did we do without it before?  Anytime we miss something on TV, we can catch up later with it on youtube).  I found an older video of a talk that was given by the leader of my church.  He said the words, "Attitude of Gratitude" (Does that sound familiar? My title for this wonderful Tuesday!)  These three words really resonated with me.  I think about the word "gratitude" a lot.  You see... I have the potential to look at my life and say, "I wish I had.... I wish I could be.... I wish things were......."  but, for the most part, I really don't.  Of course I have my moments when I wish for things, but now, I try to live in a state of mind that says, "I have it really, really good."  I have a roof over my head.  I have a job I like.  Even more importantly, I have a husband, and a family, who I love very much.  I have wonderful friends who I love very much.  I live in a country where, being a woman, I can walk down the street all by myself (not needing to be accompanied by a man).  I can do as I please.  I can drive wherever and whenever I'd like.  I have so many wonderful freedoms.  Especially being the day after Memorial Day, I was thinking about all the service men and women (past, present, and future) who put their lives on the line every day so that I can do such things and live such a life of true luxury.  For these things I feel such gratitude.  These are some things I feel grateful for, and the list goes on and on. 

I remember last year, I was having a hard time calming my mind down and going to sleep.  When I expressed this to my mom one day, she told me that counting her blessings before she falls asleep has helped her.  That reminded me of my favorite Christmas movie of all time: "White Christmas".  One of the great songs in this movie is "Count your blessings (instead of sheep)".  The first part of that song goes like this:

When I'm worried and I can't sleep

 I count my blessings instead of sheep

 And I fall asleep counting my blessings

 When my bankroll is getting small

 I think of when I had none at all

 And I fall asleep counting my blessings

When I was going through youtube, and found the leader of my church talking about an "Attitude of "Gratitude", I stumbled across another video.  This is the previous leader of my church who passed away a few years ago.  He recalls a story that his father once told him, and it really touched my heart.  I put the link at the bottom of this post (to watch it, I think just by clicking on it, it should pop up).  I hope you all can watch it and enjoy it.  What is really great about this story is that you don't have to be of my faith to understand it.  This story can be related to anyone and everyone.  It's a story about two young boys walking down a road one afternoon and the lesson they learned.

Happy Tuesday to you and yours...

http://youtu.be/naqX9iYE0V0

My Something Old and Something Borrowed

Since in my last post I was reminiscing about my grandfather, I have been thinking more and more about my family... the ones here... and the ones passed.  I have a story I'd like to share about how I got to my decision of the something old and something borrowed I would wear for my wedding day.

To start off with, I have to admit that I really had a great time in the planning process of my wedding.  I won't lie... some things did cause stress, but for the most part, I loved it.  My husband cracks me up when he tells people, "You know... these things just plan themselves."  If any of you have heard him say this, you can just rest assured that he had a big hand in planning our wedding, and he loved it, too!  Don't let him fool you that all he did was just "show up".  He cracks me up. 

So, back to my story.  I want to shed a little background.  I have a great-grandmother who I do not remember.  I met her only once, and I was only two weeks old.  From descriptions and stories I've heard shared mostly by my mother and grandmother, my great-grandmother sounds like she was a wonderful, wonderful woman.  She sounds loving, caring, nurturing...  She sounds like she was a loving wife, mother, grandmother, friend... She sounds like she never wanted to be the center of attention, but that she had a great sense of humor.  She sounds like someone who if I heard them described to me, I would want to be their friend...

 While my mother was expecting with me, my great-grandmother got very sick.  The diagnosis was cancer.  With my birth soon approaching, her condition worsened.  My mother recalled to me that when my great-grandmother realized that she would not be around long after I was born, her concern was about my dad.  You see, my mom had a scheduled cesarean with me, and would be laid up for awhile.  With this concern my great-grandmother had about my dad, she asked, "Who is going to take care of him and do his laundry?"  How sweet, sad, and (pardon me), hilarious.  Here she was, terminally ill, and she was worried about my dad and his clean clothes.  That story always made me sad, but it also brought a smile to my face.  What an incredible woman to still be thinking of others before herself when she was in such a state.  As time went by, I was born, and thankfully my great-grandmother was still alive.  I had a bad case of jaundice, so I had to stay in the hospital for a longer period of time.  Once I was able to come home, I was brought to see my great-grandmother.  My mother has told me that she remembers her holding me and talking to me, but that her voice was so weak that my mom could barely make out what she was saying.  Very shortly afterward (possibly within days), my great-grandmother passed away.  My mother tells me that my great-grandmother waited for me before she left us.  This thought has always made an impression on my mind and in my heart.  I marveled  that this wonderful woman in my life hung onto her life, even when it was painful, just to see me... me... little old me.  I always felt a connection with her.  I have tried to live my life in a way that would have hopefully made her "waiting for me" worth it.  I feel like I know her, even though I don't remember her.  I once told my mother, "I didn't even know her," and she responded, "She knew you..."

Fast forward to about two years ago.  My husband and I are engaged, and our wedding day is soon approaching.  Everything is falling into place, and we feel very good about the planning.  There was only one thing I was completely stumped on.... I had no idea of what to wear for my something old and something borrowed.  I remember one day I was visiting with my mother at her home.  We were having a really great time.  Then, I asked her for a suggestion of what to where for my something old and something borrowed.  Guess what?  She was stumped, too...  Then, in just a few moments of silence, both of us just wracking our brains, we both shot a look at each other that said, "I GOT IT!"  For another moment we were silent, but just staring at each other with big eyes.  It was truly at the SAME MOMENT.  I told her, "What are you thinking?"  She asked, "What are you thinking?"  I asked, again, and so did she.  I bit the bullet and told her that I had a thought about borrowing my great-grandmother's wedding ring which she has.  I was nervous asking this question because it is something very precious, and I would have understood if my mother felt uncomfortable with the idea.  Instead, she SHOT UP out off the couch, scurried into her room, and brought out a green box.  She gave me the ring to try on, and she told me that she had the SAME THOUGHT at the SAME TIME I DID.  I tried it on my right ring finger (but already knowing it would fit because I used to try it on when I was in high school, and it fit like a glove then, and it still did).  When I heard that we had the same thought at the same exact time, I said, "She must be here and really wants me to wear it."  My mom told me that she would be tickled pink if she knew I was wearing her wedding ring on my wedding day.  This whole experience made my heart swell.  Then, my mom (for kicks) showed me another  wedding ring.  It belonged to my great-grandmother's sister.  We got a really good laugh because, although it is gorgeous, the band is HUGE!  It was completely loose around my thumb!  She must have had very big hands.  But, the setting on this ring (she was my great-great aunt) was to die for!  It is a setting that most girls these days would go Ga-Ga for.  So, even though we laughed about the size of the band (and it was purely a laughter of love), I guess you could say that the joke was on us.  This still makes me laugh................  I also remember laughing in that moment and thinking to myself, "If they could both be here right now, I hope they would be having as much fun as we were having."

Fast forward to my wedding day.  It was fantastic, and I got to wear my great-grandmother's wedding ring.  One last memory I want to share.  It was the morning I got married.  I woke up early, went outside and looked over the ocean.  I thought about all the people who I have loved in my life who are not physically with us in body.  I knew they would be apart of our day in spirit.  This brought great comfort to me.

Thank you for reading.  After writing this blog, it makes me feel very fortunate and grateful for the wonderful family and friends in my life.  I hope you all enjoyed accompanying me on my trip down memory lane...

Happy Tuesday to you and yours...

My First Tuesday

I miss writing.  I was thinking to myself yesterday, "I don't write anymore, and I used to love it."  I started to think of ideas that would not only get me writing again but would also motivate me.  I know someone who dedicated herself to taking a picture of her dog every day for a whole year.  She is a very talented photographer, and she took the cutest pictures of her dog.  I also thought about how dedicated she had to be and that she would have to hold herself accountable for doing that... every... day...  I decided to start out small.  Once a week.  Tuesday is my most available day of the week, so I thought, "Why not title my blog, 'Tuesday Mornings with Me"? 

Just a little note, I am not sure how many people (if any) will actually read my blog.  If you are someone who knows me, then great!  If you do not know me, then Welcome!  Feel free to read and follow my blog.  I hope you enjoy it.  At the moment, I plan on keeping my identity a secret (but if you know me, then it is no secret at all).  For the people who don't know me, then my identity shall be a mystery.

I have many thoughts in my mind, and from time to time I have the notion that I should write it down.  Do I ever?  Not once... I am thinking that if I have a blog, then I will feel more motivated to write these things down during the week and share them with you all on Tuesday Mornings.

I have been thinking a lot about family lately, and I had one memory come to me a few nights ago which I would like to share.  It was very late at night, and I awoke on the couch.  I climbed into bed, and I'm sure now that it was the middle of the night.  It was cold and dark, but as I started to warm up, I was thinking about my grandfather.  My grandfather passed away four years ago, and I think of him often.  I think of the visits we had, his laugh, his lessons, his dimpled grin.  I had the following memory come back to me so strong, as if he was in heaven and thinking about it at the same time and with as much fondness as me.  I remembered when my oldest sister got her license.  It was so great because in the summer months, we (my two older sisters and I) got to go see people in our family that we normally only got to see on weekends when my mom and dad were off of work.  We would have scheduled visits with my grandparents to go and play a game our family loved........ Poker.  You may be laughing to yourself, thinking, "Three girls who liked playing poker with their grandparents?"  The answer is... Yes.  We did this many times.  My grandma would pull out a pouch full of pennies.  We would each get our allotted share, and my grandpa would teach us the rules of the game.  He would always say, "Here's how the 'Big Boys' play."  For a long time, I didn't know who the "Big Boys" were, but I didn't care.  All I cared about was that my grandpa had a more serious tone when he said "Big Boys", which meant I listened and took him seriously.  He taught us everything there is to know about the game, and it was such fun.  We played, visited, laughed, won and lost.  My grandpa would never play until the very end with us because my grandma would always give us a few pennies if we were shy of them.  Or she would fib the game a little to help us out.  My grandpa didn't like this very much.  He would slip away from the game.  You may be thinking that he was a little tough?  No... he was just very fair.  He wanted us to learn the right way, even if that meant we lost.  I appreciated that then, but even more now.  I feel now that he was trying to teach us a lesson that even if are going through a tough time, we have to make the best of our situation.  It reminds me of the expression that you "play with the cards you're dealt".  It is more than just a card game... it is a life lesson.  I also appreciated how my grandma would be very flexible and help us when we needed it (if we were running out of pennies).  Looking back on this, it makes me think of how important it is to support the ones you love (and in my mind, I'm mostly thinking of  emotional support).  What a great opportunity to learn two such valuable lessons in one setting.  This memory makes me smile.  It makes me smile not because I learned how to play poker, but because of the time spent and the lessons learned.  My sisters and I genuinly enjoyed these visits.  They were such fun. 

I remember at the end of the game, we would put ALL the pennies in the middle of the table and play one final hand to see who won.  Then, at the end, we would put all the pennies back in the pouch, and look forward to our next adventure... and learn more about how the "Big Boys" played. 

Happy Tuesday to you and yours....